Learning to Forgive Yourself

Learning to Forgive Yourself

One of the first steps on the road to wellness is to heal yourself. The best place to start is with forgiveness. 

You may have done a lot of work on forgiving people who have “done you wrong”, but tell me, have you forgiven yourself? I’m not talking about asking God or the Divine- I’m talking about finally forgiving yourself for whatever you may have done, not only to other people, but also to yourself.

Are you still holding a grudge? Even when others have forgiven us we continue to punish ourselves. This can lead to self destructive behavior like alcoholism, drug abuse, eating disorders, holding ourselves to impossible standards, and never believing we will ever deserve anything good in our lives again. 

Your brain reacts just as intensely to thoughts about the past or worry about the future as if they were happening now. This causes energy to become stagnant which leads to a build up in stress in the body. An increase in stress creates a foundation for all kinds of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual problems. High levels of stress can debilitate the body’s immune system, putting you at risk for heart disease, chronic pain and depression.

Living in the past clogs up the flow of positive energy to every cell of your body as well as your energy meridians. It blocks your ability to fully connect to your inner guidance- like muddy water, you can’t see the truth of situations clearly, your vision is always slightly cloudy.

If you are ready to have more peace, joy, gratitude, hope, understanding, empathy and compassion? If so, you can start by honestly assessing and acknowledging the things you’ve done and  how they have affected you. Evaluate what you have learned from the things you are holding yourself responsible for. How are you better because of what you have learned? Don’t spend too much time judging yourself too harshly. You’re a human being, and you’ll make mistakes. If you are sorry for something you’ve said or done, consider admitting it to those you’ve wronged. Apologize to yourself, express your regret, and specifically ask for forgiveness — take responsibility, no excuses.

While you’re at it, why stop at this lifetime? Consider past lives where you may be harboring some unforgiving attitudes about yourself. Those limiting negative beliefs can act as barriers to having and being all that you can in this life and make progress and growth difficult.

Did you know that forgiveness can empower you by providing greater spiritual and psychological well-being? It can also result in fewer symptoms of depression, less anxiety, stress and hostility. It allows you to experience healthier relationships and lowers the risk of alcohol and substance abuse.

Forgiveness is the most generous gift you can give yourself. It is your declaration that you are committed to the process of change.

 Sometimes, the kindest and most compassionate thing you can do for everyone is to forgive yourself.

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